Tuesday, March 28, 2006

A New Thing triptych: #55, 56, and 57.

A couple New Things I never wrote about:

New Thing #55: I made a cream cheese fruit dip, which I brought to my high school friends reunion. Now, the old me, well, if the old me was supposed to bring something to a pot luck type of party, he would have just gone to the grocery store and bought some pre-made food, like, immediately before the party, but I’ve been trying to learn my way around the kitchen on My Year of New Things so I decided to make something. But the problem was, I was supposed to bring a snacky type of food, and so I signed up to bring”fruit.” Which I couldn’t very well make. So that’s when I decided to make the fruit dip. I actually got the recipe from Jesse, who got it from his friend Kelly, who told Jesse that I did it wrong, but she wasn’t at the party, she was just going off of what Jesse told her over the phone, and I don’t even think he tried the fruit dip. Which is his loss, because I think it was pretty fucking good fruit dip. (Honestly, it was really easy to make. Just get a lot of cream cheese and a lot of marshmallow goo and a little bit of vanilla extract and mix it in a bowl until either it all mixes together pretty or your arm gets tired. Then start dipping your fruit.) (See? Easy.)

New Thing #56: I got a speeding ticket. This was really dumb of me. It happened over the weekend. I have never gotten a speeding ticket before. It was late and I really wanted to get home and then, boom, hello police officer. I felt really lame. She was like, “did you know that you were speeding?” And of course I did, so I was like, “yes, I’m sorry.” I really don’t have anything else to say about this one, except for the fact that it’s never happened before and (knock on wood) I’m hoping it’ll never happen again. But since it was a New Thing, I decided I should report it to the blog. Oh, and then, when she asked me to get my registration and proof of insurance from my glove compartment, this DVD called, um, "Giant Men," which I won at a raffle, like, a year ago, and which then went into my glove compartment for some reason and which has never left my glove compartment, well, it fell out of the glove compartment and then, for whatever reason, I felt even more guilty about the speeding, and I was certain that the police officer was moments away from asking me to "step out of the vehicle, sir," but I guess it's not against the law to have porn in your glove compartment when you're speeding on the freeway.

New Thing #57: I watched the first episode of Deadwood. I have the entire first season on DVD (which I borrowed from Jessica) and I have the entire second season taped on my Tivo and I’ve decided I’m finally going to see what all of the fuss is about. (I generally love everything that HBO does and there was no reason I didn’t watch this show from the beginning other than that I missed the first couple of episodes and with a show that’s supposed to be good as Deadwood supposedly is, well, I don’t like to start good shows late.) I liked the first episode of Deadwood, but I’m not anywhere close to adding it to my list of “favorite TV shows” yet. However, I hear it’s a slow burn and it takes a couple of episodes to really get its hooks into you.

23 comments:

Bonnie said...

If you take online traffic school, I can coach you through some of the answers.

And if you go in person, I can tell you the best/cheapest/least boringest ones to consider.

Hmm... wonder if they have Porn Traffic School now? That would be fun!

Jesse James said...

Ummm, I ate your f'ing fruit dip! And yes, Kelly is a recipie nazi, but yours tasted just as good.

Erik said...

I am so bad about commenting on comments lately! Bonnie, thank you for the traffic school tips/offer of future help. I will totally take you up on it. We can talk about it at our dinner...which is FAST APPROACHING!

(I can't do the math right now.) (Long day.) (No brain left.) (Me tired.)

Erik said...

Okay, Jesse, sorry, you did eat it, but someone refused. I think it was Jen who refused.

That bitch.

joe chandler said...

erik, you saw that AD is done, right?

Erik said...

Yeah, Joe, I'm beyond sad.

jenny said...

Giant Men? I can think of a LOT more embarrassing movies to fall out of your glovebox. Like, Leprechaun 2 for example.

Not that I've ever rented that...

joe chandler said...

I have a new favorite website and I figured you guys might like it...you probably already know about it. Funny that I come here to share it, you guys are like my new community.

www.girlsarepretty.com

hard to explain, but everyday there is a new post. the post details what special day that day is. done by a guy named bob power. he's really funny.

Erik said...

Joe, I'm going to go that website and hope that it gets me out of my "AD is never coming back" funk, which is worse than my previous "Derrick got kicked out of the Gauntlet" funk, but not as bad as my upcoming "I watch way too much TV funk."

Bonnie said...

All funks shall be trumped by the event that occurs 112 hours and 12 minutes from now.

Believe it.

Anonymous said...

Methinks New Thing #56 qualifies as too much information from a knee-jerk parental perspective. Just want you to know why I decided not to read that one. Love you.
PAM

Erik said...

Wait, was the "too much information" thing referring to the fact that I was speeding or the fact that I had porn in my glove compartment?

Anonymous said...

Duh, it was the whole I-won-it-in-a-raffle thing.

Erik said...

i DID win it in a raffle.

Anonymous said...

That's the scary part. Let's see, was it a church picnic or fund-raiser for muscular dystrophy or a promo night at the Boom Boom Room or...?

Never mind.

Erik said...

You are crazy. I cannot believe I was birthed from your vagina.

Erik said...

Should it be "through" your vagina?

Or should I have said, I can't believe I "came out of" your vagina?

Erik said...

Oh gosh, then that takes on lots of other meanings.

Anonymous said...

Oh gosh. See what I mean by too much information?

Erik said...

Oh gosh.

Bonnie said...

Wait!!!! Your mom has a VAGINA?!?

Erik said...

she TOTALLY has a vagina. I swear.

Erik said...

Jeez Louise, I am really bad at replying to comments lately.

JENNY: Was Leprechaun 2 the one with Jennifer Aniston?

That's pretty embarrassing. I've only seen Leprechaun 1. (Though, I think I saw it in a movie theater, which is also embarrassing.)