Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Liveblogging Rockstar: Supernova, because Jenny told me to.

Tonight’s the last night to vote for Rockstar: Supernova. I adamantly love Toby and Dilana (despite her fall from grace, I still love her and think it’s time to forgive) and I totally despise (okay, despise is a strong word, how about let’s just say I would never pay to see them perform) Magni and Lukas.

Okay, the encore previously-voted-out-but-brought-back-to-perform performance tonight is Ryan Star. Voted on by Verizon Wireless phoneholders. (Is phoneholders a word?) I went through a period of really liking Ryan Star, but then I jumped aboard the “he’s a poseur” train and I really super-duper wish that Zayra had gotten the chance to come back because she would have freakin given a performance that we hadn’t seen before, that would have maybe shocked and wowed us, and that maybe we would have thought was slightly terrible, but we would have loved it at the same time (I know we would have), whereas the performance Ryan gave tonight was, uh, exactly the same as when he sang this song five weeks ago. Or however many weeks ago. Oh man, and they gave him a car? Now I wish Storm had gotten the audience voted encore. She should get the car.

I love Dilana.

I wanna Dilana.

Sorry, they’re recapping the whole season and it’s reminding me of how awesome she is as a performer. And throwing a glass on the ground and shattering it on someone’s bald head IS kinda rockstar, you know?

Okay, now they’re recapping Toby’s performances throughout the show and now I want HIM to win. Damn.

I’d be happy with any of them. (VOTE FOR DILANA OR TOBY TONIGHT!)

(commercial break)

Toby’s up first. He’s singing Karma Police. His voice is so much better than Lukas’ or Magni’s. I don’t even understand why there’s a question here. Only two of the final rockers can actually sing. (Okay, Magni can sing, but he’s bald. I mean boring. I mean bald. I mean, he totally doesn’t register for me.) But freaking Toby…yowza. Okay, I have to admit that this performance of Karma Police is kinda boring. Maybe I just think that Toby’s hella hot. Maybe that means that Dilana should win this thing. The best part of Toby’s performance was when he kind of wailed at the end.

Toby’s singing his original song now and he’s reminding me why I went from Team Dilana to Team Toby in the first place. I want a t-shirt that says “Team Toby” on it. (If anyone out there’s taking notes for Christmas shopping, remember that, k?)

Oh-oh-oh-oh. This song was stuck in my head the other day. (Proof that it’s a good song—I’d only heard it twice and I was fucking rocking out to it in my car a week later.

Reason #1453 that Toby is rockstar: he just wrote his catchphrase (he has a catchphrase, people) on the back of Magni’s bald head.

Reason #1294 that Magni is NOT rockstar: he just made this motion like he wanted to smash his guitar and then…he didn’t. Ummmm. Don’t real rockstars actually smash their guitars when they feel like it, instead of just making a motion like “I want to smash my guitar?”

(commercial break)

Okay, Lukas is up now, singing Coldplay’s “Fix You.” Wow, he’s actually singing. I give it five more seconds…as soon as the guitars kick in, he’ll start screaming…wait for it, wait for it, wait…ok, yep, there we go…now he’s shouting and screaming. Man, whenever he actually starts a song by really singing, he always blows it. Whenever I watch him sing, I start thinking about Paul Williams (who I love) and I start wishing I was watching Phantom of the Paradise (an amazing movie, if you’ve never seen it) instead of reality television. And then Dilana or Toby get onstage to perform again and I love reality television again with the heat of a thousand suns.

Okay, I think that was probably the best peroformance he’s ever given, but it’s not enough. Paula Abdul is in the audience? That’s weird. And is that Ashlee Simpson? Who’s she with? Is she with one of the Olsen twins?

Uh…I have to give Lukas credit this week. He just sang his original song and I understood every single lyric. That was a first. And when you understand what he’s saying, his song actually sounds good. HE actually sounds good. I think he’s going to win. That’s my prediction. Lukas is going to win tomorrow. Even though he was better than he’s ever been tonight, I still feel ug about him.

Paula Abdul SO wants to have sex with Lukas Rossi.

(commercial break)

Dilana’s up. It’s time for her to continue her upward climb back to Queen of Rock. I love her a cappella opening of Roxanne. Wow. This woman has pipes. And she knows how to use them. And she’s not afraid to bring all of her competitors onstage to sing backup with her. And none of them distract from her awesomeness. This is a really hard song to sing. If you’ve ever heard anyone sing it at a Kareoke bar, you know what I’m talking about. I’ve never heard anyone other than Sting EVER sing this song and sound good. But Dilana just did it.

I still don’t really love her original, but I liked her in between song banter so much (I mean SO MUCH) better than the last time she sang this song and she was like, “this song is for all of those people out there who don’t get me,” or whatever she said.

Okay, now she’s going into the audience. She put the microphone in Paula Abdul’s face and Paula screamed. That was a really weird moment in the history of rock and roll. Where did Ashlee Simpson and the third Olsen twin go? Does Paula Abdul sing anymore, or is she too busy being incomprehensible.

Tommy Lee just said “that was hot” and he’s right. By the end of the song, I was totally into Dilana’s original song. Is Tommy Lee about to cry? I want to see Tommy Lee cry.

This is crazy. I have no idea who’s going to win this thing.

Dilana was better than Toby tonight. So now I’m back to rooting for her over Toby, but I still want a Team Toby shirt.

(commercial break)

And here’s Magni…singing Hush by Deep Purple…how awesome is the House Band? When Magni’s singing, I watch the House Band…I don’t think there’s any way that Supernova is getting rid of Lukas first tomorrow, so my vote for the first person to go home tomorrow night would be Magni. Not that that was a surprise to anyone. I don’t have anything to say about Magni. I am trying to will one of the cameras to show us the back of Magni’s head because I want to know if Toby’s “EVS” is still written back there or if Magni’s gotten someone to scrub it off for him. Okay, we just saw a slightly obscured view of the back of his head and I didn’t see any ink. I think he’s washed his head. That’s not very rockstar.

Reason #2341 Magni isn’t very rockstar: He washes the back of his head. SO not rockstar.

I wish I was watching Bjork right now.

Anyway, Magni’s still singing, but I’m bored. So it’s time to urge people to vote for Dilana. She’s back in my #1 slot. That sounds dirty. VOTE FOR DILANA! (Or Toby, I still love him.) (I really can’t make up my mind, can I? Obviously.)

VOTE FOR DILANA. OR TOBY. JUST VOTE. (at rockstar.msn.com) (For some reason blogger won't let me do links right now) (weird)

5 comments:

TheDarkerUma said...

off - topic:

i'm on the christmas episode now...and i think i've driven john off the edge. ahhh...ce la vie.

call you tomorrow love.

Erik said...

oooo i love the christmas episode!

i think the first five episodes are some of the best, and then it goes downhill a little, and then it gets really good again, and then in the middle of the season it gets REALLLYYYY good, and then there are a couple of bad episodes, and then it ends REALLY super good/powerful.

Erik said...

call me tomorrow and we'll dish.

xo

drc said...

Nooooooo!!!!!!!!!!! Not LUKAS!!!! ARRRGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!

jenny said...

OH. MY. GOD.

I can't even handle Rockstar. I'm so done with them. DONE, I SAY!

I was almost considering buying a ticket to their Chicago show until I saw the finale.

DONE!