Thursday, April 20, 2006

Bad blogger

1. I am such a bad blogger lately.

2. This is my 100th post. Happy birthday blog.

3. I have so much fricking wax in my left ear right now. Q-Tips aren't helping. My fingers aren't helping. Prayers aren't helping.

4. Toshiba can bite my butt. My computer broke today, but then a very nice man at Comp-USA fixed it. He rocks, Toshiba sucks.

5. I promise to write a real blog entry before I go to bed tonight. Real life and real writing has been keeping me real busy this week. Many apologies to the blogosphere.


christy said...


christy said...

Take that, Michelle Kwan.

Anonymous said...


Bonnie said...

Have you tried using your car keys?

Angela said...

Why is picking your ear wax so much more difficult and less satisfying than picking your nose? (My opinion, but I'm just sayin'...)

Have you tried one of those tube things where you pour some sort of liquid into your ear and then it like dissolves the wax and you let it dribble out?

Doug said...

For ear wax problems: there's this ear drop stuff you can put in your ear that ought to clear it all out. It's got peroxide (I think) and glycerine in it and goes snap crackle pop while it sits in there working. Very cool (and warm). Can't guarantee it'll work for you (it has occasionally worked for me) but it is fun to listen to it. Forget what it's called, but you can find it near the eye drops in drug stores. Other than that you can go to your doctor and have warm water sprayed in there to get it out (I kid you not, they did it to me and it works wonders, but it's hell on the equilibrium). It is so embarrassing how much of an expert I am on this.

TheDarkerUma said...

thats strange that you say that angela.

because I LOVE putting the ol cue tip in after a shower. it's one of my favorite things to do.

when i'm single nothing beats a good cue tip, glass of wine and a great book.

oh and he definitely has tried one of those tube things. i was a witness once and it wasn't pretty. and even more shocking was that it didn't get it all out.

his ear is like a mary poppins bag.

Anonymous said...

I used to be like Uma. I loved the Q-tips, I loved them in the morning, in the afternoon, in the evening. I think it may have been one of my most favorite things to do. A satisfying twirl, and the whole world felt clearer. And if I DIDN'T use a Q-tip for longer than a day, I would actually feel like I physically needed to. My ears would feel all full and itchy, and it would distract me all day.

But then someone I know punctured her eardrum in a very unfortunate Q-tip accident. Granted, this anonymous friend also "accidentally" had her eyebrows tattooed onto her face, but nevertheless, it scared the crap out of me. Or rather, it scared the Q-tips outta my ears.

Just saying.

Erik said...

You don't even know how happy it makes me to see people fighting for "First." You people rock.

Erik said...

Bonnie, I haven't tried my keys, but sometimes the wax gets so bad that I'm tempted. But I would never use my keys because I would worry too much about actually puncturing an ear drum. I know that Q-Tips are supposedly lethal, but I'm super gentle with them.

(I actually typed out the word "gentle" with a "j" as in "jentle," which means that I'm either really tired or really stupid.)

Erik said...

Angela, as much as I have to agree with you that picking your nose is immensely satisfying, I find picking my ear ALSO immensely satisfying, but ONLY WHEN I'M ABLE TO GET THE WAX OUT.

Today I was not able to get the wax out. So today I was frustrated.

I STILL HAVE NOT GOTTEN THE WAX OUT. That's why I'm yelling so much on the blog. BECAUSE I CANNOT HEAR ANYTHING.

Erik said...

Oh, and yes, I have tried one of those wax candle ear wax remover things and it was scary. You have to light them on fire and then ashes get everywhere. And it didn't work.

I wish I had taken a picture, though, because I'm sure I looked really funny.

Erik said...

Doug, thank you for the tips! I have definetly tried that fizzy stuff that you pour in your ear and listen to it try to dissolve the crap in your ear canal. I actually remember sitting at Fred 62's once (a diner in Hollywood, if you don't know it) and I was in a state of major wax crisis and so I used the stuff while I was sitting with several friends eating lunch and everyone was grossed out.

I have not tried going to the doctor and having him wash the wax out. (Actually, that's a lie--I once went to the doctor and asked him to do that AND HE WOULDN'T. He told me to go get the stuff that goes fizzle in your ear and makes the crap dissolve. Suffice it to say, I never went back to him again.)

Erik said...

Uma knows me better than just about anyone, and she's freaking right about comparing my ear to a Mary Poppins bag. I cannot think of a more apt comparison. I love it. It's true.

Erik said...


I used to know a woman who had eyebrow tattoos too! I wonder if it's the same woman. I actually knew her for several months before I realized her eyebrows weren't really made out of hair, but they were actually tattoos. Which means that either they were really great tattoos or I'm really unobservant or both.

Erik said...

Christy, Michelle Kwan ain't got nothing on you.

Erik said...

Lindsay, you will be first one of these days. I'm sure you will be.

Doug said...

Erik, I think the spraying water thing is frowned upon by some doctors. I went to an ear doctor (yes, the wax thing got that bad--he had to scoop it out with a little spoon thingee that has a long long handle, and I got all dizzy and nearly urped all over the guy), and I told him about the spray technique and he scunched up his face and said they didn't do that here. Like it was barbaric or something. Like sticking a foot-long spoon down your ear is any better.

christy said...

This just came to me, so feel free to file it under, "vaguely relevant information."

Did you know that ear wax keeps mosquitos away?

Not to mention a whole host of other things it keeps away.

And like Uma, I enjoy a good Q-tipping, too, more than picking my nose.

Angela said...

Oh, I just remembered that mah peeps (aka "Koreans") use a wooden stick with a little scoopy thing at the end to kinda spoon out the wax. When I was a kid, my parents used to clean my ears with that thing for me. It tickles and feels weirder than a Q-Tip, but it really effin' cleans out your ears.

I think you can buy them at the Asian grocery for like 79 cents in the "impulse buy" part of the line (where you'd normally get gum or those dissolving Listerine breath strips).

(Not that I'm really advocating that you go to an Asian grocery specifically to look for an ear-wax-cleaning stick.)(For all I know, it might scoop out pieces of your brain.)

Bonnie said...

Hee! You should totally buy a brain-scooping stick at the Korean market. That rocks. *snork*

I've had my ears candled once. I loved it. KiKi, you totally have to have someone else do it for it to really work. DIY ear candling is a little scary and probably not too effective.

Most stores that sell spa supplies can hook you up with an ear candler and it's not too expensive. Very satisfying.

But honestly, there is nothing as satisfying as that first REALLY HUGE booger you get out after you've been sick for like EVER and you no longer have the energy to blow your nose so you just take NyQuil and go to bed for a day and when you wake up and blow your nose you can tell there's a really big one waiting to come out so you go digging for it and it's like HUGE... like it has parts of your brain in there.

And you just feel so CLEAN after that.

Well... after you wash your hands, of course. ;)

Bonnie said...

Okay, this is so nothing I could ever post on my own blog.

What does THAT say?

Bonnie said...

Wow. I totally shut down comments on this thread with my icky disclosure.


Eleanor said...

Bonnie, don't be silly. Everyone fights for the super huge boogers. It is one of the hidden meanings of life. You're just man enough to admit it.

Erik, I don't think it's the same person. This anonymous friend accidentally tattoed her eyebrows on, so once the hair started growing over them she left it like that and had like double eyebrows. So, did the person you know have both? Also, this anonymous friend is Korean. Wait... are we talking about Angela's mom?

Bonnie said...

Awesome! I so love that Eleanor knows I have more balls than any other man here.


Thank you, Eleanor.

Anonymous said...


You totally have the most balls out of any blog reader of Erik's. Everyone should admit things of this nature. The world would be a much better place if everyone had balls the size of Bonnie's.

YOU rock.

I got your back,

Bonnie said...


Lemmeknow when you get a blog (or where it is if you already have it) so that I can leave supportive comments for you there someday.

Or, I guess I could just leave 'em here. Or at Babes McPhee's. Or at my own blog. Hmm.

Anyway, thanks!

eleanor said...


You can leave supportive comments for me wherever you want. It'll be like an ego-boost easter egg hunt. Hee hee.