Yes, Erik's potential suitors (did you note the 's'...I'm talking rightfully thousands) - if it were true I wouldn't say it to his face. It's that simple.
Yeah, Dave, I just thought I owed it to my readers to be super clear that I have never pooped in my pants (since I was a baby, at least), but if i HAD pooped in my pants, and it was a good story, then you sure as hell know I would be blogging that story right the fuck now. Because I like to share.
Okay, 1st, you can't call thirds on your own blog. It's your damn blog. It's not right. What kind of a game is that? Oh, I hope I can comment as soon as I finish typing this, oh goody, I'm so excited, but how will I know exactly when I'm going to finish...
Second, I DO get eyebrow dandruff. But I enjoy it. I like to scratch my eyebrows over dark pieces of paper and see how much I get. It's great.
1) The only eyebrow dandruff sufferer I ever knew of was my dad.
2) It does stand to reason that if you have really really bad scalp dandruff (like Dad) you might have have eyebrow dandruff, too.
3) The two people who come to mind as having the worst dandruff also had the best hair--you know, thick, lush and delicious, well into middle age (and, in the case of Dad, beyond). So maybe it is hair-lucky to have dandruff.
4) Please don't shampoo your eyebrows with Head & Shoulders. OW!!!
Oh, and Colleen, I've tried to whole "Head and Shoulders on my eyebrows" thing and it seems to be kinda futile. But the Head and Shoulders works on my head, so I rarely have dandruff there anymore. Just on my eyebrows. Which is weird.
Angela, have you never heard of Eyebrow Dandruff? I mean, actually, I've always kinda thought that I was the only one, but I'm really happy to hear about Colleen's dad's Eyebrow Dandruff because now I know I am not the only person who has ever gone through this.
Jesus Christ. These people OBVIOUSLY do not have children. And for g_d's SAKE, Erik, have you truly NOT GOOGLED EYEBROW DANDRUFF?
It's seborrheic dermatitis. Put some goddamn .5% hydrocortisone steroid-type cream on it and DON'T GET IT IN YOUR EYES.
Or ON YOUR PENIS.
Love even tho you didn't call me to go to The Strip goddamn it my eyes are watering from missed-the-boat whiplash but it's not just you and it's not just this it's that i saw brokeback mtn for the first time two nights ago and all i want, erik, is to make one great movie. In my life. Is having children enuff? Ntozake Shange Gray
25 comments:
I knew a guy in college who I called "Eyebrow Dandruff". To my sister.
I called *him* Steve.
Are you going to start calling *me* "Eyebrow Dandruff" behind *my* back?
Now that you know?
Oh, and second. (Or, third.)
No.
Erik McPoopyPants.
How did you know?
Just a feeling.
In case any prospective suitors read this, I would just like to clarify that I do not, in fact, have "poopy pants."
Whew, that's ^ good to know
Yes, Erik's potential suitors (did you note the 's'...I'm talking rightfully thousands) - if it were true I wouldn't say it to his face. It's that simple.
Yeah, Dave, I just thought I owed it to my readers to be super clear that I have never pooped in my pants (since I was a baby, at least), but if i HAD pooped in my pants, and it was a good story, then you sure as hell know I would be blogging that story right the fuck now. Because I like to share.
Okay, 1st, you can't call thirds on your own blog. It's your damn blog. It's not right. What kind of a game is that? Oh, I hope I can comment as soon as I finish typing this, oh goody, I'm so excited, but how will I know exactly when I'm going to finish...
Second, I DO get eyebrow dandruff. But I enjoy it. I like to scratch my eyebrows over dark pieces of paper and see how much I get. It's great.
Third, do you ever check your regular email?
Eleanor
Yes, yes, yes, I do, I do check my regular email, just not as obsessively as I check this.
1) The only eyebrow dandruff sufferer I ever knew of was my dad.
2) It does stand to reason that if you have really really bad scalp dandruff (like Dad) you might have have eyebrow dandruff, too.
3) The two people who come to mind as having the worst dandruff also had the best hair--you know, thick, lush and delicious, well into middle age (and, in the case of Dad, beyond). So maybe it is hair-lucky to have dandruff.
4) Please don't shampoo your eyebrows with Head & Shoulders. OW!!!
Oh--and no one will call you "Eyebrow Dandruff" b/c that is a sucky nickname.
Snowy McPowderBrows, on the other hand...
Snowy McPowderBrows!?!??!!! Oh, man.
Oh, and Colleen, I've tried to whole "Head and Shoulders on my eyebrows" thing and it seems to be kinda futile. But the Head and Shoulders works on my head, so I rarely have dandruff there anymore. Just on my eyebrows. Which is weird.
Colleen is right. "Eyebrow Dandruff" isn't even remotely creative.
Snowy McPowderbrows is *much* better.
EYEBROW DANDRUFF???
Snowy McPowderbrows. That's rad.
You could also go by Sir Brows McFlakesALot.
CoCo Wainwright, will you have my babies?!?
Colleen, it sounds like Snowy McPowderbrows is really taking off.
You have ruined me.
Angela, have you never heard of Eyebrow Dandruff? I mean, actually, I've always kinda thought that I was the only one, but I'm really happy to hear about Colleen's dad's Eyebrow Dandruff because now I know I am not the only person who has ever gone through this.
I have never heard of eyebrow dandruff. (Had.)(Have?)(Had.)
Not only is your blog entertaining...it is highly educational.
Angela, I just try to entertain. Any education I impart is purely by (lucky) accident.
The thing about eyebrow dandruff is...it's really annoying, just like normal dandruff, but it can be immensely satisfying to scratch it out.
I can't believe I just said that.
Jesus Christ. These people OBVIOUSLY do not have children. And for g_d's SAKE, Erik, have you truly NOT GOOGLED EYEBROW DANDRUFF?
It's seborrheic dermatitis. Put some goddamn .5% hydrocortisone steroid-type cream on it and DON'T GET IT IN YOUR EYES.
Or ON YOUR PENIS.
Love even tho you didn't call me to go to The Strip goddamn it my eyes are watering from missed-the-boat whiplash but it's not just you and it's not just this it's that i saw brokeback mtn for the first time two nights ago and all i want, erik, is to make one great movie. In my life. Is having children enuff?
Ntozake Shange Gray
It's insane, I know, but I actually HAD NOT googled it. THank you for the resources!
And I am a total putz-jerk for going to the Strip without you.
bigXO
(and I know you will make that film) (I want to make that film too) (the one great one)
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